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The Waking
I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow.
I feel my fate in what I cannot fear.
I learn by going where I cannot go.
We think by feeling. What is there to know?
I hear my being dance from ear to ear.
I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow.
Of those so close beside me, which are you?
God bless the Ground! I shall walk softly there,
And learn by going where I have to go.
Light takes the Tree, but who can tell us how?
The lowly worm climbs up a winding stair;
I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow.
Great Nature has another thing to do
To you and me; so take the lively air,
And, lovely, learn by going where to go.
This shaking keeps me steady. I should know.
What falls away is always. And is near.
I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow.
I learn by going where I have to go.
--Theodore Roethke
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Joy's Updates - Straight from the Horse's Mouth.
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Monday, May 19, 2003
A Month of Mondays
Tomorrow I have the first of four weekly maintenance Rituxan treatments. That consists of sitting in the chemo room hooked up to an IV for at least four hours, maybe six. Side-effects aren't as bad with Rituxan as with chemo, but I can tell I've had something and felt tired and like I was getting the flu before. I hope it's not so bad again this time. I dread it. After this four weeks (every Monday), I'll do it again in six months and then again for one more round in a year. The idea is that it trains my immune system to recognize the lymphoma cells since it's targeted just for them, so it will be able to fight cancer from now on. Results have been good with it, and I believe they will be for me, too.
I watched the funeral for June Carter Cash on TV this afternoon. Roseanne Cash delivered the most eloquent, heart-felt eulogy to her! It was wonderful and so well-written and warm. She's incredibly articulate, talented, and intelligent. Johnny Cash looks so frail and bereft. Roseanne captured their relationship and his and the family's feelings in her words at the funeral.
12:47:00 AM
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