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The Waking
I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow.
I feel my fate in what I cannot fear.
I learn by going where I cannot go.
We think by feeling. What is there to know?
I hear my being dance from ear to ear.
I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow.
Of those so close beside me, which are you?
God bless the Ground! I shall walk softly there,
And learn by going where I have to go.
Light takes the Tree, but who can tell us how?
The lowly worm climbs up a winding stair;
I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow.
Great Nature has another thing to do
To you and me; so take the lively air,
And, lovely, learn by going where to go.
This shaking keeps me steady. I should know.
What falls away is always. And is near.
I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow.
I learn by going where I have to go.
--Theodore Roethke
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Joy's Updates - Straight from the Horse's Mouth.
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Saturday, August 03, 2002
Interim
Kari did really well but was sore and had to get over the surgery which is no small deal. They didn't sleep much at the hospital but are getting back into a routine at home. Kathy's stepfather-in-law had 12 inches of his colon and 17 lymph nodes removed during surgery and will have to undergo chemotherapy because they found cancer in one of the nodes. I hope everything goes well and that Charlotte gets her blood sugar under control.
I have felt so good the last few days since it's that interim between the Prednisone wearing off and the swelling getting so bad. I've been cleaning and getting things done at last! This makes me realize how bad I've felt for so long. I can't remember not being really tired for years. I'd have to rest after taking a shower! The house is a symptom of this. Instead of berating myself and feeling guilty for having a character flaw, I'm seeing this for what it is. I have pushed and pushed myself for at least ten years and had no energy left over when I got home. No wonder I collapsed in front of the TV and computer and/or took naps. It's gotten worse as the lymphoma progressed. I really do need this year off to rest and recuperate and am so glad I can do it. Eventually I'll get the house in order and like I want it. I'll do a little at a time and plod along. Then I'm going to take some people up on their offers to help. I do appreciate that so much, so watch out!
It's good to be busy and make progress and listen to audio books. Then day after tomorrow!! Yikes!! Actually it's good to know something is going to make me well again. I feel positive about it and trust Dr. Spigel. Thanks for all your good wishes and prayers! It means so much to know you care.
8:50:00 AM
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