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The Waking
I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow.
I feel my fate in what I cannot fear.
I learn by going where I cannot go.
We think by feeling. What is there to know?
I hear my being dance from ear to ear.
I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow.
Of those so close beside me, which are you?
God bless the Ground! I shall walk softly there,
And learn by going where I have to go.
Light takes the Tree, but who can tell us how?
The lowly worm climbs up a winding stair;
I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow.
Great Nature has another thing to do
To you and me; so take the lively air,
And, lovely, learn by going where to go.
This shaking keeps me steady. I should know.
What falls away is always. And is near.
I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow.
I learn by going where I have to go.
--Theodore Roethke
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Joy's Updates - Straight from the Horse's Mouth.
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Monday, August 05, 2002
First Treatment
I made it just fine and had no allergic reactions! Thanks for all your thoughts and prayers! I feel really good now, but the nurse said I'd probably feel wiped out the next day or two. The nurse was really helpful and explained everything thoroughly. First she put an IV in my wrist and dripped saline solution and then added an anti-nausea drug and Decadron, a steriod. Dr. Spigel changed my treatment for some reason. All he said was that he thought this wouldn't be as hard on me. Instead of FNP+R, I'm now having CNOP+R only one day every three weeks for six times. This means 6 treatments instead of 18. I'm not sure if that means this is more aggressive than he thought and is doing something stronger for one day or what. He didn't tell me but did doctor speak instead.
He did say I could lose my hair with this which I wasn't prepared for since the other wasn't as likely to do that. They put this cold cap on me which is supposed to help prevent hair loss. It felt good on my head. I liked it. Now I need to shop for a floppy denim hat with bangs and a wig that is so not me. I've already been every shade of red so might move on to other colors even though I think my students sort of miss the red hair which was that burgundy Aigner color when I had a terrible hair accident and then tried to fix it every weekend. They still talk about it.
For you fellow researchers, here's what CNOP+R stands for. C = Cytoxan (Cyclophosphamide) N = Novantrone (Mitoxantrone) O = Vincristine (Oncovin) P = Prednisone (which he didn't make me take and is going to see how it works without it - whining worked) R = Rituxan (Rituximab) The CNO part will be given each week with the Rituxan (a monoclonal antibody / immunotherapy) given four times, I think.
Anyway, so far, so good! I'll keep you posted! See how well all of you are doing here? Keep it up and thanks a million!!
6:48:00 PM
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